


Infinitely Yours

by simplysunshine



Series: Yours and Mine [1]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Car Accidents, Cas is Dean's Home, Castiel Loves Dean Winchester, Dean Winchester Loves Castiel, Flashbacks, Fluff and Angst, Hospitals, Hurt Castiel (Supernatural), M/M, Married Castiel/Dean Winchester, Worried Dean Winchester
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-04
Updated: 2019-03-04
Packaged: 2019-11-12 01:18:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,178
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18001052
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/simplysunshine/pseuds/simplysunshine
Summary: “There’s been an accident.”Four words—just four, little words—that manage to punch right through Dean’s ribcage, wrap their claws around his heart, and rip it free. He chokes on his tongue in his attempts to speak, thinking, is it Sammy? Please, don’t let it be Sammy. Anyone but Sammy.“W-who?” He asks, his voice trembling in time with his knees as they threaten to give out on him.He waits and waits and waits for them to speak, and when they do, he’s not sure what he feels because it’s not Sammy; it’s so much worse than Sammy because it’s—





	Infinitely Yours

**Author's Note:**

> Hey! I wrote this earlier today so I hope you like it! Let me know what you think!

“There’s been an accident.”

Four words—just four, little words—that manage to punch right through Dean’s ribcage, wrap their claws around his heart, and _rip_ it free. He chokes on his tongue in his attempts to speak, thinking, _is it Sammy? Please, don’t let it be Sammy. Anyone but Sammy._

“W-who?” He asks, his voice trembling in time with his knees as they threaten to give out on him.

He waits and waits and waits for them to speak, and when they do, he’s not sure what he feels because it’s _not_ Sammy; it’s so much _worse_ than Sammy because it’s—

“Castiel Novak. He’s been airlifted to the hospital in critical condition. We need you to come with us, Sir.”

But he’s frozen to the spot; his legs threatening to send him to the floor as everything inside him rejects the idea that _Cas—_ his Cas—is…is—

Fuck, he can’t even _think_ it.

He looks down at the platinum band on his left ring finger, stroking it with his thumb as everything goes quiet. Everything but the ringing in his ears and the memories playing on a loop in his mind.

***

_“A date? A real, honest to God, date?” Cas raises an eyebrow with a half smirk on his face as Dean nods, chewing his bottom lip as he waits for a reply._

_“Yeah—you know, I buy you dinner, we go to a movie where I try to hold your hand and then by the end we haven’t actually watched any of it ‘cause we’re too busy making out in the back to pay attention and…yeah. A real date.”_

_Dean’s heart pounds in his chest as he waits for a response that seems to take forever to come._

_“Fine, but I’m picking the movie,” Cas says with a grin. Dean grins too as excitement burns bright in his heart._

***

He blinks his eyes open to the city streets whizzing by outside the police cruiser window. Red and blue lights flash as siren-sounds fill his ears, taking up his focus and letting him forget for only a moment before he remembers where they’re going. _To see Cas…in the hospital…where he’s…where—_

He blinks away the tears that try to well in his eyes and threaten to spill over, forcing himself to contain it until he sees the damage. He _will not_ cry—not yet.

The police officer doesn’t try to speak with him. Dean’s sure this is far from the first time he’s been in this situation and he knows just how _much_ Dean doesn’t want to talk. He wants Cas. All he wants is _Cas_.

He closes his eyes and his mind drifts to their happiest day.

***

_He smiles at Cas as he squeezes both his hands, stroking them with his thumbs as he keeps their eyes locked, only vaguely registering the preacher's words. He knows Cas doesn’t need this promise to be together, but Dean does—he wants to have Cas in every possible way. Cas knows that, too._

_“The couple has decided to prepare their own vows. Castiel, would you like to start?”_

_He nods, giving Dean his brightest smile and squeezing his hands tighter as he begins. “Dean…you know I’d promise to love you forever even without the ceremony—I know you know that. You’re my best friend and my biggest supporter in everything I do and I love you for that. Through all the good and bad times, you’re always there, so I want to be that for you, too. I want to be your rock and shoulder to lean on like you are for me. Through every trial and tribulation, every sick day when you’re acting like a giant baby…”_

_The crowd laughs as Dean turns his nose up at him, but he can’t hold back his watery grin—he doesn’t even try, really._

_“I promise to celebrate all your successes and comfort you in your defeats because they are_ our _successes and defeats. You’re not alone anymore and you never have to struggle by yourself because I love you and I’m here,” his voice lowers as he leans in closer. “To infinity, Baby.”_

 _Tears well in Dean’s eyes and fall down his cheeks as he smiles brighter than he ever has before. All Dean wants to do is kiss him because this man is_ his… _to infinity._

***

All of Dean’s senses are frozen for the moment and will be until he sees Cas again. He needs to see him alive and recovering—more than anything he needs _that_. He doesn’t know what he’ll do if, God forbid…

He’s struck so suddenly by the urgency of it all that his breathing speeds up and his breaking heart pounds wildly against his ribs. When he looks out the window again, it’s with a relieved sigh as he sees that they’re not far from the hospital.

 _I’m coming, Angel,_ he thinks. _I’ll be there soon._

He closes his eyes and rests his head back on the headrest as his mind travels to a good place—a happy place.

***

_“Come on, Cas! Get off your ass and swim with me!” Dean waves both arms above his head as the sun shines down on him, burning his freckled skin. Cas lays on a lounge chair up the beach, an umbrella shading him from the bright rays._

_“I told you—I can’t swim!” He shouts back before holding up his book for Dean to see. “And I want to finish this.”_

_“C’mon! I’ll teach you!” Dean watches as Cas’s shoulders sag with a sigh as he drops his legs over the side of the chair, pulling his shirt over his head before making his way across the sand towards Dean._

_Dean smiles in delight as he reaches a hand out for Cas to take, holding his eyes as Cas tries desperately to keep his grin from breaking through the pout._

_He pulls Cas closer, pressing a soft, reassuring kiss to his lips before leading him into the ocean._

_“Don’t you dare let me go,” Cas growls, stepping closer to Dean’s side as he watches the flowing waves swell around his ankles, then knees, then hips as they go deeper. Dean can only laugh as he squeezes Cas’s fingers._

_“Your mine, Baby. I’m not_ ever _letting you go.”_

***

Dean jerks out of his memories when the cruiser stops outside the Emergency doors and then he’s running. Through the doors and the waiting room straight for the nurse's station. He doesn’t know what he says to the nurse, but he knows he asks for Cas.

The sympathetic look in her eyes almost sends him to his knees but she only tells him he’s still in surgery and to find a seat to wait; the doctors will update him when they can.

So he takes a seat, burying his head in his hands as he thinks of all the stupid shit he said to make Cas leave. God, he’s an idiot. They’re _both_ idiots, but Cas is _his_ idiot and if he dies…he doesn’t know what he’ll do.

He might not survive the loss of everything Cas is to him because he’s not _just_ his husband. He’s his best friend—the love of his life and shoulder to lean on…he’s Dean’s safe place—his home.

And now, thinking back on their argument, he can’t help but think it’s all his fault that Cas is in this situation. That, if he’d only told the truth, they’d be at home right now, curled up in front of the TV with two cups of hot cocoa and a bowl of caramel popcorn between them, watching _Dr. Sexy_ reruns and laughing at the drama of it all.

But now they’re here and it’s not funny. It’s real and terrifying and he could _lose_ Cas because of all he couldn’t say.

***

_“Just go, then. If that’s what you want.”_

_“Seriously? That’s all you have to say to me?_ Seriously?” _Cas all but screeches, throwing his hands over his head when Dean doesn’t react, just sitting at the kitchen table with his hands folded in front of him._

 _“It’s your life, so if you want to take a job on the other side of the world, be my guest.” He doesn’t want him to leave, though—God, that’s the_ last _thing he wants—but Cas isn’t happy here and this city holds Dean’s entire life. He can’t leave and Cas can’t stay, so he should just_ go.

 _“It’s_ our _life!” Cas paces on the other side of the table, running his fingers through his hair as he grinds his molars. He stops and faces Dean, his eyes pleading. “Please…just come with me—just for a little while.”_

 _But he knows Dean can’t. Lawrence is the only home he’s ever known and leaving would mean changing everything about himself. He can’t do it, and that hurts him more than anything because it hurts_ Cas.

_That’s exactly what he has to do, though, to get him to leave. This is an awesome opportunity for Cas; it’ll change his entire career, and Dean can’t take that away from him._

_“Just_ leave! _”_ _Dean shouts, pounding his fist on the table. “I’m not leaving and you’re not staying no matter what we say to each other, so just get your shit and_ go! _I don’t want you here if you’re just going to be miserable.”_

_Dean can’t look at him as tears well in Cas’s eyes. He just barely sees him flinch before pushing his chair back and leaving the room, heading for his garage._

_He works out his anguish on his car, trying to calm himself enough to think reasonably, but he hears the front door slam before he can get control of himself._

_With a sigh, he throws down the wrench and picks up his grease rag to wipe his hands clean. He’ll give them both time to cool off before calling him; let him at least get to wherever he’s staying for the night._

_A sick feeling twists in his stomach, though, and he can’t help but feel like something’s wrong. Cas shouldn’t have left. Dean shouldn’t have told him to go._

***

“For Castiel Novak?” Dean shoots to his feet and meets the doctor halfway across the space. “Mr…”

“Winchester.” Dean pauses before adding, “And it’s Novak-Winchester.”

The doctor looks at him with narrowed eyes. “What?”

“Castiel Novak-Winchester. He didn’t want to lose the family name, or whatever. He’s my husband…” He doesn’t know why it’s so important that the doctor knows this, but it is.

“Okay…well, Castiel is out of surgery but there was some pretty severe internal bleeding and head trauma. We won’t know until he wakes up whether there will be any lasting effects from that, but you can see him if you’d like—”

“Yes,” he says, cutting the doctor off. “Yes, I want to see him.” He nods vigorously to emphasize just how _much_ he wants to see him.

“Follow me, then,” the doctor says before turning away and leading Dean through the maze of hallways. Dean doesn’t have any clue of where they’re going or how they got there as his heart pounds hard. He tries his hardest to prepare himself mentally, but nothing could have readied him for the sight of Castiel.

He chokes on his own breath as tears well in his eyes. Cas is a _mess._ Bruises, bandages, and blood cover him from head to toe. He’s hardly recognizable around all the tube and wires and machines, but Dean sits anyway, taking Cas’s fingers between his as the heart monitor beeps the sound of Cas’s life back to Dean.

The doctor stands a few paces away, discussing something with a nurse that Dean doesn’t listen to. Instead, he speaks his own words to the man he loves more than his own life.

“I…um, I’ve decided to come with you, by the way. I know I said I’m not leaving Lawrence, but I changed my mind.”

He sniffles, wiping at his cheeks and searching for a reaction even though he knows he won’t get one. “It doesn’t really matter where we are, anyway; as long as I’m with you, everything will be fine. We could go anywhere in the world and I’d be fine as long as I have you, so—” His voice breaks and he takes a shuddering breath as his heart aches harder. “So, you have to be okay, okay? You have to get better.”

He reaches up with trembling fingers and strokes the only place he can find on Cas’s cheek that isn’t marred by cuts and bruises. “I don’t know what I’d do without you, so you can’t go. You’re my home, Cas; the only home I’ll ever need.”

His fingers catch a stray tear as emotion clogs his throat. He thinks of all they’ve been through together and he can’t even _imagine_ trying to carry on after Cas—he doesn’t _want_ to carry on after Cas. “You're my forever home, and I’m yours… _infinitely_ yours.”


End file.
